From one of my early coaching experiences, I learned the importance of not judging clients. One notable case involved coaching the head of marketing at a manufacturing company, focusing on enhancing “Risk appetite” and moving away from a “Conservative” mindset.
During our initial meetings, the client shared a guiding principle: “Karmanye Vadhikaraste, Ma phaleshou kada chana, Ma Karma Phala Hetur Bhurmatey Sangostva Akarmani.” My understanding of this verse from the Mahabharata was limited. When I asked the client for his interpretation, he explained that Krishna tells Arjuna “he has the right to act but should not be attached to the outcomes of those actions”. Initially, I perceived this as a self-limiting belief that was hindering his progress. Time proved me to be wrong!
As our discussions progressed, I observed that the client set extremely high standards for himself and prioritised work over personal relationships and self-care. This raised questions for me: How could someone so driven be conservative? I began to wonder if the key to addressing his conservative approach lay within the very phrase he lived by. A conversation with a senior coach prompted me to explore the concept of phrase further. I did some research about the phrase and it led me to a few questions and realisation about selflessness as well.
I revisited my notes and asked the client a few probing questions: What actions are expected of you in your role? What does fulfilling your duty mean? What results do you expect from your actions? When I inquired if he had validated his answers with others, he admitted he hadn’t. I encouraged him to seek feedback from his business confidants.
Through this process of self-validation and follow-up discussions, we uncovered additional themes such as collaboration, reluctance to seek help, and the focus on results that he thought was good enough. These insights were corroborated by 360-degree feedback, leading me to identify a “Hyper-achiever” approach as a potential area for behavioural change. This approach proved effective.
I learned that understanding aphorisms is more crucial than merely knowing them. For instance, clarifying what actions are expected in a role goes beyond listing roles and responsibilities; it involves understanding what success looks like and how one’s role contributes to broader organisational goals.
When the client’s sponsor expressed gratitude for the positive changes observed, I reflected on the essence of selflessness in coaching. As coaches, our role is not to seek personal gain or recognition; we assist others without concern for rewards. The verse shared by my client resonated deeply with me and emphasising the importance of not judging oneself or the client.
In summary, my coaching journey with this client highlighted the significance of understanding rather than judging, the value of self-validation, and the need to explore underlying mindsets. By fostering a deeper comprehension of their roles and expectations, clients can shift their perspectives and behaviour’s, ultimately leading to meaningful growth and development.